I just need a hug!

This has been a very rough week. At this point I am emotionally, mentally, and physically spent. Nathan being sick is very hard on me. And now Logan is sick. We go back to the doctor tomorrow morning. I'm anxious to find out what's going on with Logan. I am praying it's just a cold.

Today started out ok but went downhill quick. Stress levels are at their max right now. It just hurts to not feel appreciated. And it is so hard to have to do everything and to be stuck in this house all the time. I just wish Mom or Cheryl lived right around the corner. It would be nice to get a break every once in awhile. Now don't get me wrong. I understand that I am a mom. I love my babies and would do ANYTHING for them. But Moms deserve a break too.

I really hate it when John and I aren't on the same page. It makes me feel uneasy and anxious. Sometimes I wish he wasn't so stubborn. It's tough to always be the one who gives in and surrenders. It starts to wear on you.

Sorry I just had to vent and it's my blog so I'm allowed to do that! And I repeat...I just really need a hug!

Nathan Follow up

Yesterday was very rough! RSV gets worse before it gets better. Last evening he had such a bad coughing fit that he ended up vomiting all over himself and the couch. Poor baby! And he just keeps screaming "Momma Momma help me!" My heart is breaking bc there is nothing I can do to make it go away.

On the up side, today he seems a little better. His cough still sounds awful but it sounds like everything is loosening up. His nose isn't as runny as it was. And his spirit seems much better today. I know it is far from over but hopefully he will get better and better everyday. We are scheduled to go back to the doctor on Monday.

Thank God he doesn't sick get very often but when he does it's bad.

Nathan is sick :(

Soo I finally get back to the gym last week. And wouldn't you know Nathan picks something up his second day there. AHHH it is so frustrating that people do not keep their sick kids at home. For one those poor babies should not be drug out anywhere. And for two they spread it to everyone else!!!

Nathan has RSV. RSV is the most common germ that causes lung and airway infections in infants and young children. Most infants have had this infection by age 2. Outbreaks of RSV infections typically begin in the fall and run into the spring.

RSV is spread easily by physical contact. Touching, kissing, and shaking hands with an infected person can spread RSV. The disease spreads from person to person through contact with contaminated tiny droplets or objects that the droplets have touched.

Symptoms

•Bluish skin color due to a lack of oxygen (cyanosis)
•Breathing difficulty or labored breathing
•Cough
•Croupy cough (often described as a "seal bark" cough)
•Fever
•Nasal flaring
•Rapid breathing (tachypnea)
•Shortness of breath
•Stuffy nose
•Wheezing

All I can say is my poor baby :( I am praying that Logan does not get it because it is very dangerous for children under a year old. We have been giving Nathan breathing treatments every four hours. He hates them! But all in all is doing pretty good with them. I just wish I could make it go away! I am so thankful John was home yesterday. Nathan would rather have him than me. He is definitely Daddy's boy. So today may be a little rough. We'll get through it. I just have to stay strong.

My 3 boys = My life :)

I had a nightmare last night :( I think it was due to the horrible sleep I got. Logan was up like every hour. I think he is teething. Nathan didn't get teeth until he was one so we never went through this with him. Anyway back to the nightmare... It just made me want to hug and kiss all my boys! John, Nathan, and Logan are my world. I love them more than anything! They bring me such joy and happiness. And of course drive me crazy at times :) But without them I would be completely lost.

Nathan my first born son. I will never forget the feeling of touching him for the first time. He was so warm, wet, and wonderful. That moment I became a mom was truly magical.

Logan my baby boy! Giving birth to him was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. But I would do it ten times over for the awesome reward I got :)

I still cannot wrap my brain around the idea that John and I made such miracles. My body physically created these two little beings. I can't quite grasp the magnitude of it. And I don't think I ever will.

Marrying my best friend was the best thing to ever happen to me. I can describe it like this: Waiting to walk down the aisle I was so nervous! I felt faint and nauseous. I was a complete mess. As soon as I got to the alter and John grabbed my hand, I felt complete calmness wash over me. It was a very serene feeling that I have never experienced before. I knew in that moment I was exactly where I was suppose to be. It still bring butterflies to my stomach to this day thinking back to that moment. That's how I know that John is the perfect man for me.

God really has blessed me with more than I could ever deserve. I know I say that over and over. I cannot help but be thankful for the wonderful family I was given. Living so far from everyone we really only have each other. I just love my husband and my sons so much. I will tell them that again and again because we can never say I love you enough!

Happy Birthday Dad!!!

Happy birthday to the hardest working man I have ever known, my dad!! Enjoy your day Dad, you deserve it! Wish we could be there to help you celebrate! We love you!

And on a side note...Logan rolled over today!! He went from his belly to his back! These milestones make me so proud!!

Day 2!

Yesterday all four of us went to the Gym. Nathan was beyond excited! He loves going there and playing with all the other kids. He is so cute! About half way through our workout I got paged to the Kids Klub. I always feel like I'm doing the walk of the shame as I slowly walk, head down, to see what's up. It was just a dirty diaper! Very relieved. When I used to take Nathan when he was a baby they always paged me bc he was hysterically screaming and crying. Most times I never got to finish my workout. So I can deal with dirty diapers all day every day :)

I love when John and I get to workout together. There is nothing like watching your spouse pump some iron! It makes me feel good that we are getting healthier together. Now to just get him to eat healthier...wishful thinking!

Tomorrow we are going to head out to Clearwater. I am excited to see John's store bc I have never seen it. And we will be eating Skyline!!

TGIF!!

Thursday night John and I got to spend a couple hours on the back patio while the boys were sleeping. I love those times where we are able to "reconnect" if you will. We have a couple cocktails, crank the jams, have great conversation, and just act silly!

Friday morning John took the boys and let me sleep until 9am. It was very nice! I'm starting to feel like a zombie due to lack of sleep. I don't know what to do. I just wish these boys would start sleeping through the night. Nathan is going through a phase where he says he is scared of everything. And he says he doesn't like his bed. Very frustrating! And I'm not sure what's going on with Logan. According to a book I have he should've started sleeping 7 hrs at 3 months...ha! Not my kid. And one problem is that I can't let him cry himself back to sleep in the middle of the night because he wakes up Nathan...and then everyone is upset and no one gets sleep. I just have to keep reminding myself that they are only little once. One day I will look back and wish I had my cuddly little babies back!

Logan and I went to the Gym. It felt so great to get back at it. I am looking forward to getting back into shape. Now that I know John and I are done having kids it motivates me even more to lose the weight. I can't wait to look back six weeks from now and see my progress! And breastfeeding has already given me a head start. I am four lbs lighter than I was when I got pregnant with Logan!!! I just need to tone everything up!

Friday afternoon we drove down the road to the Power Plant. The manatees come there every winter because of the warm water. There were hundreds of them! And we saw a ton of sting rays, sharks, and fish. Nathan had fun running down the docks. It ended up being a beautiful sunny day.







Well we are heading into John's last week of work before his schedule changes...boo! I just hope it works out better than I anticipate it to. I sure am going to miss his Saturdays off though.

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!

I have been doing my own personal Bible study to deepen my relationship with God. I've been using a great book called "The Busy Moms Guide to Bible Study". I love it. The whole book is made up of 15 minute exercises. As I was studying last night I came across chapter 4 of Philippians. It spoke VOLUMES to me! I love it when I get that feeling of elation after reading scriptures! God was definitely talking to me last night!

Rejoice in the Lord always. Again I will say rejoice! Let your gentleness be know to all men. The Lord is at hand. Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Jesus Christ. Philippians 4:4-7

In my own words what that is telling me is that even when I am worried or anxious about something I still need to rejoice in the Lord. I need to pray about it and give all my worries to God. I need to trust that God will provide deliverance.

As a mother and wife my life is usually alway plagued by worries about something or other. This scripture reminds me that "I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me"!! The power of prayer is awesome!!

Weekend Review & Logan's checkup

It was a beautiful sunny weekend here in Tampa, Florida. Saturday went downtown and had lunch on the Bay. Then we took the boys to the Aquarium. It was Logan's first time there. He LOVED it! I sat him up against the tanks a few times so that he could see the fish. He was very interested and couldn't take his eyes off of them. The first tank was the lobster tank. It was really funny bc the lobsters were just as interested in him as he was in them. They all started crawling towards where he was. Very cute! And course Nathan had a great time. Although he still won't touch the stingrays or the starfish. It was a great family outing.





Sunday we stayed home and got things done here. Nathan helped Daddy outside. They got all of the Christmas lights taken down and put away.

Today was Logan's four month checkup. I cannot believe it has been four months already! Time is flying by much faster than the first. His checkup was great. Doctor said everything looks good. He is now 26 inches long and weighs 15 pounds. He is starting to thin out and shoot up in height. Dr. Richards also gave us the go ahead on solids. I've given him baby oatmeal a few times but now on to the good stuff!

Let's hear it for the weekend!!

This will be John's first weekend off since early November. We are all very excited. Nathan will be estatic to get to spend two whole days with Daddy! I also love having John home and I love the extra help. I got pretty emotional last night. Logan was very fussy last night. He pretty much screamed all evening long. Nathan wanted to read books and everytime we tried Logan would interupt. Nathan ended up snuggling up on the couch and falling asleep by himself. I know there is nothing I can do about it, I just hate sometimes that I am only one person. It breaks my heart when Nathan has to be put on the back burner. He needs me just as much as Logan. So I feel much better when John is home even if it's just in the evening. Nathan can get the attention he needs and deserves. Life with two babies is wonderful and challenging at the same time. What I want most is for my boys to always know that they are loved and adored so much! You never know how much you can really love another person until you have children.

The Circus!!!

Last night we took the boys to the Circus. Everyone had such a great time. We went early to the All-Access Pre Show. Outside they had all the animals. We got to see the elephants, horses, and tigers up close. Once inside we got to go onto the floor and meet all the clowns. Nathan was a little unsure at first but he seemed to like them. We watched a couple clown shows, watched an elephant paint, and Nathan got a tattoo.





When the show started Logan FREAKED! He is not used to loud noises (how is that possible w/ Nathan around right?!??!). But once I got him calmed down he did great. He actually slept for most of it. Nathan got lemonade in a special circus cup and he had his first cotton candy. He didn't like the cotton candy at first. The texture was too weird for him. But once he understood that it was candy he couldn't get enough.



Nathan stayed interested pretty much the whole time. He did great staying in his seat. He fell asleep with about 30 minutes left of the show. And he was OUT! The show really was awesome. Great for everyone! We put Nathan to bed when we got home and he slept all night until the storm woke him up this morning. What a great fun family outing! I feel so blessed that we are able to do these fun things with our children. Making family memories is the best :)

Happy Birthday My Love!

32 years ago today God put my husband on this Earth. I cannot say how blessed I am to have met and fallen in love with such a wonderful man. I do not have words for how much John means to me. I really do fall in love with him over and over. He has given me so much. We have such a beautiful family and wonderful life together. Of course we have our fair share of speed bumps in the road but together we can get through anything.

John thank you for everything you do and have done for me. Thank you for giving me two beautiful sons. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for being you. Thank you for all of the wonderful memories we have made. I look forward to sharing many many more birthdays with you :)

Happy birthday my love! I hope every year is better than the last! I love you!!